Exposed: the severe ethical breaches of superhero journalists

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Journalists have an almost superhuman ability to hold forth on the ethics of our own profession. And yet, despite endless talk about “self-plagiarism” or some such, we have been wilfully blind to the more grievous ethical breaches carried out by revered reporters who cover the so-called “superhero beat”. Perhaps we are unwilling to admit that those who write about truth and justice are the least likely to champion transparency and proper attribution. Here are some examples of the most severe offenders:

Clark Kent

When it comes to journalistic ethics, Mr Kent is not so super after all. He regularly reports about himself without disclosing as much. He deceives his employers by moonlighting during working hours as a doer of derring, leaping his contractual obligations in a single bound. Worst of all, he uses the privileged inside information that he gleans as a journalist for his own personal gain during his extracurricular activities. Here is a man who is faster than a speeding bullet, stronger than a locomotive, and about as transparent as either of those.

Lois Lane

Seemingly strong-willed and single-minded, Ms Lane superficially seems like a role model for aspiring journalists. But closer investigation reveals a troubling tendency to sit on stories that clearly belong in the public domain, especially when it benefits her friends. She has won a Pulitzer for reporting about a source who she has long been romantically involved with – a fact that remains undisclosed. Sympathetic readers will see a journalist torn between personal emotions and professional duty. Others will see a woman who is not just hiding the location of weapons of mass destruction from her readers, but is actually sleeping with one.

Jimmy Olsen

Or to give him his official epithet: “Superman’s pal: Jimmy Olsen.” His sin is in plain view: this hungry, young, and undoubtedly talented photographer has gone native. He has sacrificed his journalistic independence by revering one of his sources as some sort of lofty superhuman god, becoming little more than a snap-happy PR agent to the Man of Self-Promotion. Perhaps “Superman’s Pal” might better serve the public interest as “Superman’s Critical Friend”.

Peter Parker

Imbued with the proportional strength, speed and ethical judgment of a spider, Parker has made a career of taking photos of himself in a mask and selling them to his employers. Some might argue that Parker is merely a symptom of the poor wages awarded to photojournalists, and the intense pressures they face (“I want pictures! Pictures of Spider-Man,” his editor regularly exhorts). Amid such a cutthroat environment, this promising talent has clearly learned that with great power comes great ethical lapses.

Spider Jerusalem

Finally, a journalist whose ethics are beyond reproach. Hound of truth. Scourge of authority. Ignoring the guns and wanton drug use, here is a reporter we can all look up to.

(Inspired by this Daily Mash piece and the fact that discussions of journo ethics can get a touch po-faced. Contributions from Tim Carmody and Dean Burnett via Twitter.)