Table manners, though they vary wildly from culture to culture, generally boil down to a couple of basic premises: mindful appreciation of food (we’re lucky to have it) and compassionate awareness of fellow eaters (we need each other). This isn’t to say that good manners can’t be put to bad use. Table manners, since time immemorial, have been perverted to enhance social status and reinforce class barriers. Manners can be the equivalent of a fraternity hazing, or at least an embarrassing stick in the eye to those who aren’t quite in the know.

In 1922, the same year Emily Post published her best-selling EtiquetteEmily Post published her best-selling Etiquette, Lillian Eichler published the competing two-volume Book of Etiquette,