Britt Goodenow figured she had virtual playdating nailed when her sons joined a video Dungeons and Dragons game. The Takoma Park, Maryland, mom figured it’d be the perfect activity to keep her kids occupied while she and her husband got some work done.

Then the screen crackled, and the rolling-dice website went down. One boy started crying, saying that not being able to play was ruining his day. Then everyone started yelling advice—all at once.

“It was complete chaos for close to a half hour,” Goodenow says. “Eventually everyone just gave up and signed off.”

Tears might be the extreme when it comes to virtual playdates, but almost any parent who’s tried this solution to keep their kid social is familiar with that