Corned beef and cabbage, no matter what we’ve been raised to believe, isn’t a national Irish dish, and the tradition of eating it on Saint Patrick’s Day, far from being Irish, is as American as mom and apple pie.

Similarly American are Saint Patrick’s Day parades—the first was held in New York City in 1762—and it’s Americans (trust us) who invented green beer.

On March 17, the Irish are much more likely to eat bacon with their cabbage, and to down a pint or two of (non-green) Guinness. In fact, until relatively recent times, they didn’t even get the Guinness. Saint Patrick’s Day in Ireland traditionally was a religious holiday. The pubs closed down and people went to church.

Ireland has a